Writer's Block: Talk like a pirate day!

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'Tis an oldie but a goodie.

I once sat down with an old sea dog, one with a peg leg, hook hand, and eyepatch.

"How'd you lose your leg?" I asked him.

He replied, "Well, once I fell off the side of me ship. Afore anyone could throw me a rope, a shark jumped up and bit me leg off in one go!"

I nodded and asked, "How'd you lose your hand?"

The pirate replied, "I was fightin' a crew of bucaneers under the command of Captain Richard Blood. 'Twas a fierce battle, me hearty, but we won the day. But when I crossed swords with Captain Blood, he cut me hand off at the wrist!"

"And your eye?"

"A seagull's droppings."

I was confused, needless to say, and asked, "A seagull's droppings?"

The pirate shrugged and said, "'Twas me first day with the hook."